On July 25, 1979, I had my second child. Everything went fine, but that night, laying in my hospital bed, I looked toward the end of my bed and near the wall was a sillouette of a woman holding a baby (it looked more like a shadowed image). I looked to see what might be causing the shadow to appear, but there was no explanation. The first thing that went through my mind was that "an an angel is holding a baby. I reached for the phone to call my husband, but thought, no, he won't believe me. The image lasted for about a minute, then it was gone, but it left an uneasy feeling inside me. The next day, the doctor came in and said the baby was fine and could go home, but this experience went with me.
We left the hospital on a Friday and the following Monday, the baby became listless and wouldn't eat. I took her to the hospital where they checked her and decided she was a bit jaundiced and put her under the lights. The next morning, I received a call from the doctor who said when they cchecked her blood, they couldn't get the bleeding to stop and would be transferring her to Valley Childrens Hospital. Over the next two days, the doctors tried feverishly to raise the platelet count in her blood and get her internal bleeding under control, by giving her blood transfusions, etc. Nothing worked.
About 9:30 Wednesday evening, I was asleep in my bed. All of a sudden, I was jolted awake by activities in my stomach. I felt a baby being lifted from me - I felt the legs push away as they went last. Then, there was the emptiest void in the pit of my stomach, like someone took a pair of scissors and cut the silver cord I'd heard about, and I knew in my heart, what had happened. The next morning, we rushed to VCH only to be met by our doctor who said "Up until 9:30 last night, there was brain activity" After that, nothing. We had to make the decision whether or not to keep her on the ventilator. We both knew in our hears that she was already with the Lord, so we let her body go.
Four weeks after this happened, our 21 month old son was playing in the floor of my mom's living room. He was "talking" to someone and saying "no, I wanna stay here" and "no, I stay with gramma." This scared my mother who told me that evening. The following weekend, I was again at my mothers house and it happened again. I asked the baby, Joey what is it, who are you talking to? He said "her" and pointed toward the ceiling (just as he'd done before). I said "who is her?" He said "Janae (the baby's name). I said "what does she want?" He said "she wants me to come with her to play." I couldn't believe this. The next thing I knew, in a loud voice, my mother said "Janae, Joey will stay here for now - you go on ahead and he'll be with you later."
After that, our son was not seen talking to her again. This was a very limited experience for me with the "otherside", but one that to this day, is still as vivid as if it happened yesterday. I also have peace in my heart knowing that this little baby already loved my son so much she wanted him to be with her. I truly believe in my heart that someday, we both will be. I hope this story brings comfort to someone who just lost a baby - know that the child is with God and will be waiting for you too - as is mine.